Dominant Seventh

Well as you all know my Irch decided to open the blog content up to any questions you all might have for us - because i know i often struggle for blog topics, and apparently Irch is tired of telling you all how wonderful i am - though i don't know how that could be, He hasn't even told you all half of the things that make me so wonderful. (joking, joking ... seriously)

But i thought i might be the first to tackle one of the questions which was posed by Votary. She asked:

As far as my curiosities go, they always venture quite imaginatively into the blank spaces in your entries. I always wonder more about your day to day lives, and what strategies you use to make it through each day without each other. I feel like I struggle a lot with loneliness and self-doubt in a LD relationship, but you guys make it seem so effortless. So what's your secret(s)?

I think this is something that we both tend to gloss over alot in our posts - we tend to stick to the soaring highs, rather than dwell on the low points we come to when we write here. But i do think that we both struggle at times with loneliness and things like that in our relationship. I will only speak for myself right now, and Irch can chime in later if He feels the need.

I am one of those natural-born-worriers. I worry all the time - i worry about being late to work when i still have 20 minutes before i have to be there, i worry about paying my bills even though i know i have more than enough money to cover them, i worry about my family's well being, i worry about Irch's well being, i worry that one day He'll wake up a decided this long distance thing isn't working, that it's not worth it.

It's just the way i am, i guess - and i have been this way for as long as i can remember.

So things get hard at times, being long-distance means i can't get those reassuring hugs and soft caresses that would normally ease my worrying mind, i don't get to look into His eyes, every day or sleep beside him every night - and it's hard. I hate the distance, and i hate that we can't have all those little things that we crave every day.

There are little things we do to help ease the frustrations and depressions of being so far apart. I think the biggest help recently has been the webcam, to be able to actually see Him does a world of good for me - to see the look of love in His eyes, even though we're so far apart helps to push aside all those thoughts that sometimes fill my mind.

The collar i wear also helps me a great deal. I don't often realize the number of times i reach up during the day and just hold the charm between my fingers - it's a physical reminder of the bond that Irch and i share, and it helps to calm me and give me strength through out my days without Him.

The trip i took to see Him in December was actually fueled, in part, by an intense period of missing one another, and we decided to make the spur of the moment trip - of course, as much as i might like to, we won't be able to just make sudden trips like this whenever we miss the other just a little too much. But those times when we are together they really do help the in between times. Being able to remember that when we're apart and pull up shared experiences and memories together when we talk on the phone really does help ease the pain.

And apart from Irch, i have been able to share Him with my friends, with whom i live and see daily - and even when I am not able to talk to Irch on the phone, or see Him over the webcam, or any of the things we might normally do when we're missing the other. I can tell them, I can complain to my best friend that long distance relationships suck, that i miss Him so much, and all i want to do is be held by Him again, and she is there for me. She is there to comfort - and tease - me when i need it. And i think that is one of the biggest helps, that it's not just me dealing with this on my own, but knowing that Irch is as well, and that i have friends who i can turn to when i need to.

So those are some of the things that really help me, Votary. I am sure Irch will have a few things to add, seeing as He usually does.

But feel free to ask more questions, if you haven't already, or even if you have. Irch seemed really excited at the prospect of having ideas from someone else about what we should post here - He's a bit excitable when it comes to the blog, if you haven't noticed already. ;)