Six Months In

Well today is k's and my half-year anniversary. I really don't have the words to express all she means to me and the abundance of passion I feel for her. Once in a while, things I write here or elsewhere may capture a tiny fraction of the deep singular love I feel, but for the most part, words aren't much more than pathetic and miserable attempts. Of course, that won't stop me from trying...

I just finished sitting and reading all the posts on this blog, which I started very soon after our "collar moment" six months ago. And from this vantage point, I find myself echoing something that I've said a few times here in the past: one of the most amazing things about my relationship with my k has been how natural it's been. Sure there have been times of nervousness and uncomfortableness here and there, but it's always been short-lived, and there's never been any doubt between us about where we're going and what we're doing. We've been in sync with each other's desires for a long while now. That in itself is just stunning.

And when I look through the changes we've gone through over time, it seems impossible that the naturalness could have stuck around through all that. Here's a little "Then and Now" to illustrate my point...

THEN: chatting in IM a few times a week and exchanging emails
NOW: constant contact through each day and night with the phone and text messages too

THEN: really close friends who enjoyed getting kinky together
NOW: totally earth-shatteringly, soul-searingly in love

THEN: D/s in the space of sexual scenes only
NOW: D/s more pervasive, through offline assignments and real-life non-sexual stuff too

So many other things too... I've discovered the joy and thrill of spanking k, something that never really did much for me before. k's started to stretch her brat muscles *smiling groan*. I feel more connected to this woman I love than I ever have, feel overjoyed every day that she is mine. My heart must be ten times as big as it once was, just to contain the love that I feel for her.

I've grown so much because of her as well, not just as a Dom (though yeah that's been quite a journey itself), but just as a human being. And I can feel how she's gown and changed as well. The whole experience just floors me sometimes - like how could things possibly be this good, ya know? Have to do that reality-check, step back, and then realize: yep, it really is just that good. In fact, it's better.

Each day that she's been mine has been a true profound brilliance - the whole world just shines. I don't know precisely what the next six months will bring, but I can state with certainty that they will be surprising, fulfilling, transcendent, joyous, sexy-as-hell, and full of love.

Happy Anniversary, my beautiful sublime k.